Want to laugh? Want to cry? Want to wince in pain from sheer awkwardness? Maybe something below can help with that. Buckle up and good luck, bitches.

  • Becky

The Tiny Psycho

A lot of my stories right now are retrospects - catching up and documenting encounters from the past two years, and I just can't remember the order of things. So damn my OCD and the desire to keep things chronological. Anyway, this little shit was just that...a little shit. This is what happens when you're an entitled, manipulative, rotten little fuck boy, and your parents raised you to think the whole damn world revolves around you, and the one single moment something doesn't go your way, you throw a tantrum. NEWS FLASH: DON'T FUCKIN BE LIKE THAT! So here's what had happened. One fine day, I'm swiping along on Bumble - swipe left, swipe left, swipe right, swipe left 10 more times - and one of these clowns I mistakenly swiped right on, matches with me. We message a bit back and forth, no major sparks or anything that really catches my interest. I agree to go out with him sometime so we exchange numbers, but I was ultimately bored and had just walked away from a different fuck boy I had caught all of one feel for, so I wasn't seriously in the mood.

I forget what the details were exactly, but whatever the deal was, plans got cancelled and were never officially rescheduled. So I see this as my opportunity to stop replying. In the meantime, he does that creepy thing I don't like, where he's following me on social media before we've met irl. Every once in a while, he'd comment on my story or something I posted and I would respond because I'm not a total dick. One day, he decides to text me and Starts off by asking me to dinner that night, in 30's like 5pm and I'm getting ready to make an appearance at an Asian culture event, aka I have a prior commitment. I shouldn't have to say this, but you are allowed to have prior commitments. But he didn't think so. He starts telling me how I'm fake and a liar and every misogynistic insult he could come up with because I wasn't interested in rescheduling a date with him, with literally no notice. Let me reiterate here - YOU ARE ALWAYS ALLOWED TO CHANGE YOUR MIND AND NOT MEET SOMEONE IF YOU'RE NOT FEELING IT OR IF YOU'RE FUCKIN BUSY! No one should ever pressure you to go out if you don't want to and they especially should not resort to insults.

Or until you intentionally screenshot images from 3 years ago to send to the person you're stalking because you're nuckin futs.

But it gets better. He proceeds to scroll through my instagram back to 2015 and start taking screenshots of motivational posts I've shared saying how fake I am because I don't "practice what I preach" about taking chances and just going for things etc. Like if I seriously took a chance on this guy, I'd probably wind up murdered, hanging in a meat freezer, in some third world country. So now this guy has gone off the fuckin rails with the crazy right? Screen shot after screen shot of my own content to try to make me feel bad. Like bro, there is literally nothing you can do to me that is worse than what I've already gone through. Save your breath. Anyway, I'm ignoring him because again, I'm getting ready for an event and then I was in a carpool with some other friends also going to the event. Exhausting my finger tips by replying to him was low priority. Next thing you know I have 200 text notifications of this little man losing his marbles! I ended up blocking his number, blocking and reporting him for harassment on Instagram, and blocking him on any other social medias I could find him on before he could find me. I never even met this person, and he was full blown stalker mode...and that's how it ends! It was just wild and crazy and a fat red flag. Moral of the story, don't ever let some prick pressure you in to anything you don't want to do. Whether it's going on a date, something sexual, or eating 10 lbs of mashed potatoes on camera. If you don't wanna do it, don't do it. Welcome to America. Freedom. Bitch.



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